Hmmm.

The concept of Twit*ter annoys me, and yet that seems to be how I'm blogging these days-140 characters at a time.

I've been looking half-heartedly for a new apartment as mine is too tiny for words. But now I need to get serious about it. Mainly because winter is coming, and with no entry way for shaking off/dripping the snow and rain, so the apartment will be a big sopping mess for 4 months straight. But now, because I found mould in my bathroom this morning.

When the washer fills/drains water comes up through the bathroom floor. Apparently stopping that from happening was not enough. Mould, people. I see major construction in the not so distant future. Bah.

The high-school ex (HSX) continues to message me, and while it's nice to be in touch, it's a bit odd just how MUCH he's in touch. It's funny, too, how odd a thing it is to know someone so very well with regards to their personality and behaviour and yet know nothing about their life for the last 15 years. For instance, who knew that his 'passion' was for cooking?! And he's opening a catering company on the side? Boggles me, it does.

I'm very quick to anger lately, and I don't like that. I've been frustrated and bored at work. I need to get off my butt and start looking for something different, but the motivation isn't there. So I guess that means things aren't that bad! :). I DO need a vacation, but cannot afford one right now, so that's out. I am not the type of person that can take days off and just hang out at home and come out feeling relaxed. That makes me depressed that I didn't do anything productive with my time. Anybody want to win the lottery and cut me in on the proceeds? I didn't think so. Oh well--back to the drawing board.

I've been trying to come up with some sort of plan to make money on the side myself, and I have to say I'm not doing so well with it. Well, that's not true, it's just that I require more free time than I currently have to put the plans into action.

Plan A: gluten free Christmas baking. Cookies and squares platters for people who think there's nothing for them to eat at Christmas fests. I could do this at home and put up signs at the grocery store and on Kijiji.

Plan B: event planning. I have quite a lot of experience with this, as I used to arrange and coordinate company picnics for a living. I'll plan, arrange, set up, serve at, and clean up your private event in your home.

Plan C: errand running. I.e. Picking up groceries, dropping off and fetching dry-cleaning, Christmas gift shopping for people who hate malls but have not yet embraced the interweb. The problem with this is not knowing how many people would use such a service, and how much to charge for convenience. I'd have to play it by ear and see-standing in line at Toys R Us has to be worth A LOT! :)

Anyway, I'm open to suggestions and limited in saleable skills.

I guess I had more than 140 characters worth of stuff after all. Lucky you! *tee-hee!*

Have a lovely day, Poppets!

P.s. For those of you in the know, my baby sis got engaged on Tuesday night! :) no date for a while, but quite a lovely ring.

Sent on the TELUS Mobility network with BlackBerry

Oh no!

So last night I was up late.

I was actually, for the first time in ages, composing a real blog post. Apparently the fates were against me because there was a power surge at about 12:30am and the power went out. This wouldn't normally be an issue as I use a laptop.

Except for the power surge.

Because now my computer won't work. And I am SAD.

Oh well, the crack berry will help console me through this time of great loss. (tee-hee!)

I had a house-full this past weekend. It was nice, but exhausting. I worked all day Thursday until 9:30 and then had people trickle in until midnight. It was pretty nice, I must say. I got to keep Christine overnight, and DD and the boy-child stayed until Monday.

Friday I dropped C. At the basketball tournament venue, and then the boys and I went to Peggy's Cove. It was a pretty lovely day out, if a bit chilly.

Friday night we went to see Neil Young at the Metro Centre. The show was good, but the opening band stunk. The tickets were ridiculously expensive, particularly to see only one band, and I'd have never gone to it if I'd been the one buying the tickets.

I worked the next morning at 6, and I have to say that it sucked. Anyone in retail will tell you that if stores are to be closed for a day, people think the world is coming to an end and shop like fiends both the day before and the day after aid holiday. Suffice to say that Saturday blew dead goats.

Saturday night DD took The Child to his aunt and uncle's place and the grown ups went out on the town.

A friend of mine from out of town was home for a visit, so some other friends of mine had a wee house party to mark the occasion. Then we all went off to Cheers. 'Twas a train wreck.

We all had a blast. I bumped into Dan-o. I thought I was saving some girl from some creepy guy; and while this proved to be true, I also found myself in a bit of a pickle when she started hitting on me. My radar is usually a finely tuned instrument but it was temporarily off key due to massive alcohol consumption. Oopsie!

I earned myself a very solid hangover on Sunday, and we didn't get up until 2:30. Supper at DD's brother's place was nice, although I could have happily done without him telling them I wasn't doing so well. Oh well. He's pretty slick otherwise.
Because we were out of town on Sunday afternoon I missed getting to say goodbye to Christine, which made me sad. At least I got to see her a bit, even if I had to work during all Bobby's b-ball games.

Overall, I have to say that it was a pretty fantastic weekend.

It's amazing to me that i've finally found somebody who thinks it's fun watching me have fun and mess around with my friends instead of being a big drag who hates my friends.* He even ENJOYED hanging out with them. Pretty impressive, considering that my friends and I are a) quite a handful, b) humungous flirts, and c) out of control. It was a really nice surprise.

*this is not to say my exes were all big drags-(in fact Billy was not at all) but it's really rare for me to find someone that actually not only understands that I'm different in different settings, but actually lets me be me and actively enjoys that. So odd. So refreshing.

Anyway, this is kinda ridiculously long for typing out on a text message keyboard. So have a happy day, Poppets-and please say a few for the speedy recovery of my 'puter!

Sent on the TELUS Mobility network with BlackBerry

Library stuff for locals!

Most of you will not be aware that the Atlantic Book Awards and Festival is on now, until the 18th of the month.

Why do I mention this, you ask? Well, first because I love books and authors and paper and all things innately Canadian (and so should you); but mainly because there is a really cool event on Saturday and you should know about it.

On Saturday, April 18th from 10am - 4pm at the Captain Spry Community Centre is going to be held the First Annual Free Book Bonanza.

This is a family event (translates to Bring. Kids) with book trading, a book doctor to fix up the beloved Dora adventures, and readings from some great local children's authors.

You should either go, or send someone you know so that it is as successful as it should be! Want more details? Call 479-3031. I have no idea whose number that is, but since it was on the flyer I got at the bookstore, it's probably okay for me to print it here. I hope. :)

Happy Wednesday, poppets.

Traffic court.

That's where I'm at. I've been ridiculously anxious about it for the last few weeks, waiting and worrying and imagining all the horrible outcomes that might be heading my way. Now I sit here on the floor in the hall of the courthouse-waiting.

I have to say, I don't get the feeling that this is going to be as serious as I had imagined. Apparently, this is just to enter a plea and then we have to come back to tell our tales of woe. Hrmph.

***
Well, that was fairly uneventful. Now I go back in November to explain my little saga. At least I got a little Blog out of it, considering I've been trying to write for weeks now. Maybe a real post tonight. A girl can dare to dream!

For the record...

Facebook is a soul-sucking demon that makes you feel guilty for not wanting to 'befriend' people that you don't like in real life because you don't want to hurt their feelings.

'Ignore' is such a harsh way to deal with people who are only minor irritants in real life. I generally 'friend' them, and then delete them later once they've had a chance to peruse all my photos. Much less offensive that way, and yet...I still feel guilty about it. What's up with that, anyway?

Hi. :)

I suck. I'm aware.

Painfully aware. One day, I'll detail it all. Now? Not so much.

I keep WANTING to blog. I keep NEEDING to blog. And I keep NOT doing it. So here goes. Breaking the silence. :)

I'm living in Halifax again, and happy as a pig in mud about that.

I've had an offer on the house, and we close on the 4th of March. WOOT!

Sadly, I'm not nearly ready to be moving away from there. I'm SOOOO over Amherst, but yet not ready to be leaving my beautiful little house.

And the boy is too far away. Because I've moved away. And that's hard to get used to again. And I don't really want to. But I also don't know that I'm prepared to do anything about it...because I'm not prepared to move again. And I don't want him to move. Sad, but true.

I've had a particularly crap-tastic week, but what's become crazily evident is what amazing friends I have, particularly in Billy. I'm a VERY lucky woman.

I'm baking cookies. The house smells yummy. I'm having some tea, then off to bed. :)

And I'm so glad to be back and have broken the silence again. Hi. :)

So much..

...has happened, transpired, and taken place over the last 2 months.

I've gone home, twice. I've been to 3 weddings. I've gone trick-or-treating, thrown a surprise birthday party for my mom, seen my prodigal sister for the first time in 7 years, moved back to Halifax, put my house up for sale, and been invited to move across the country with a boy--should his current career aspirations work out as planned. I've also taken a leave from work for two weeks, screwed my career, and decided that it is better to be happy than to be important.

I've been busy.

Sometimes too busy to write, sometimes too overwhelmed. But here I am now.

I've missed my best friend, and was very excited to be in a place where I could get that friendship back...and now, it appears to have derailed itself. I've been deleted from MSN. And it makes me very sad. Ah well. This too, shall pass.

I've missed you too. And I can't wait to be able to tell you, again, what's been going on with me. But for now, suffice to say that I'm home again, and I didn't think I could be this happy to be here.

Hi honeys, I'm home. :)

Vote. Now. Go!

vote.

A.B.C.

Anything But Conservative.

Negative campaigning?

Openly mocking other candidates?

Keeping national candidates out of the public debate because you don't like them?

POOP for goodness sake?

Grow up, Mister Harper.

HILARITY

For those who don't have the bandwidth for embedded...check this LINK instead!

10:29 am.

I was supposed to work at 10:00 am. Which means being at work at 9:50 am.

I'm not there yet.

Motivation? Zero.

*sigh*

I guess my continued employment is contingent on my showing up. So I should probably go do that.

Movie about home.

I found this on YouTube when watching a boating disaster at the Allanburg bridge. I'll post that another time.

This particular video is about the dearth of things to do in Welland, Ontario. Growing up near there, it was nice to see. And lovely to see a young film-maker doing such positive things in, and for, his community.

Go, give it a look...it's worth the 10 minutes.

Breaking the silence.

I've been wanting to post every day for a month now. But I have not, for one reason or another.

Things have been great. Fantastic, actually. So much to tell...I'll catch up one of these days.

Short versions?

Billy finally came to see the house. It was good. He apologized for being an ass last fall/winter. I accepted the apology. We sat, and talked, and cried, and talked, and held, and we're good.

Christine and Bob came to visit! I got to see them, reconnect with Christine, get to know the kids a bit...it was awesome.


My dog has adjusted and loves me more than breathing. I love him back.

Darwin-


DD is very much a part of my day-to-day. It's odd for me, but nice. He's so attentive. I really like his kid. It scares the hell out of me--because I'm afraid to frig things up. I'm afraid to become too involved, in case it doesn't work out. I'm afraid of having to break up with BOTH of them. Hell, I dated a guy for an extra YEAR in high school because my sister loved him so much--I didn't know how to break him up from my family!

Anyway...I'm happy. I had a great weekend this weekend--the boys stayed at my house because the Child had a regatta in Shediac this weekend and my place is closer than theirs. It was really, really nice having them both in my space. It was cozy, and felt like it was supposed to be that way. Scary stuff.


I went out with Caileen & Jane's daughter last night, and had a blast. We all got trashed. DD offered, before i went out, to come fetch me if I needed a ride. I was surprised, as nobody has ever offered this before.

So...i called. And he came to get me. And he was a good sport. And he stayed up and listened to me gabble for a bit after. And then we slept. And it's so nice having him in my space.

Anyway--that's it for now. I can barely keep my eyes open.

Until more updates-- enjoy some photos.

Jumping right back in.

Just breaking the silence.

I figured that the best way to start again, is to just do it.

So here you go.

I should be asleep...so I'm going. But I've got a lot to say...so I'll be back.

-DD finally said something about liking me
-he did it on the Wednesday after the last post
-we didn't get a lot of sleep because it took him until 3am to get up enough nerve to say something
-my response was nervous laughter (this is NOT a good way to respond)
-we smooched
-that was good
-he came back the next week
-we smooched more
-we may have done more than smooch
-i pointed out how terrible an idea it would be for us to get involved, but did it anyway
-he REALLY likes me
-he's a pretty decent man
-who really, REALLY likes me
-who's willing to drive 2 hours at a time to see me
-this weekend he did it on Friday night for a surprise
-it was a pretty good surprises
-lynn and alicia were coming down already that day though to help paint the house
-he stayed anyway and hung out with all of us
-they liked him, he liked them. it was a good surprise
-the girls painted my living room while i was at work on saturday
-it was awesome of them
-my house is starting to feel like MY HOUSE--now that it's painted especially
-the trim still needs done, but i can live with this for now--it's just sooo much better
-before this weekend, I was talking to DD on Wednesday or Thursday, and apparently a contact of his at H*me Despot emailed him about 'i hear you're sleeping with one of your store managers'
-it was annoying, irritating, pissed me off, angered me, and was incredibly disheartening that a reputation i've worked hard to build for 10 years could be destroyed by someone's car sitting in my driveway overnight.
-this weekend happened, and it was a great weekend--very relaxing.
-Also, it was nice to see a boy that wanted to see me and so drove 2 hours on his motorcycle to make that happen, and then drove 3 hours home in a rain storm. And is prepared to do it again...however long that takes. Pretty spiff.
-the girls painted my house. Awesome.
-i got lots of sleep, lots of jabber, and lots of friendly love. I have AMAZING friends. I am VERY, VERY, VERY lucky.
-tonight, i got a message from DD that he was getting called up on the carpet by the powers that be because someone called someone important to mention that we're seeing one another. Which we're technically not. Because I haven't decided yet. But he was warning me so that i could be aware in case someone said something to me.
-he's very thoughtful like that, because he wants me to not suffer any repercussions because he really wants us to go someplace. And he's considerate like that anyway.
-but he's worried. and I'm very worried for him. i'm prepared to tell people to fuck themselves because my private life is none of their business. however, his job DOES intersect with mine, and i don't want to do anything to jeopardize his integrity (or my own!)
-he's doing the physical test for the RCMP in 2 weeks. if he passes that, then he's quitting anyway
-i don't want to ever date a cop
-i should likely back off now anyway--and make his life easier. But i get the decided impression that he does not want that at all. he wants more involvement, not less. he's very persuasive.
-i want to be sure it's the right decision. *sigh*
-people suck, big time.

Anyway...bedtime.

Oh yes...and I may be flying home to Ontario on Wednesday morning for a funeral, and then back here on Friday morning. My last remaining grandparent died tonight. It's sad, but mostly because I feel loss at a relationship that never really was.

I always envied people who were closer to their grandparents. My grandma on my dad's side was never particularly close to us--not since we were tiny, anyway. She's a lovely woman who loved Jesus in a way that is not quite natural. She bought into all the television evangelists and whatever snake oil they were selling this week. She parented her kids until they turned 12, then they were on their own. She thought my mother was the only thing keeping my dad out of the priesthood. She wanted my mom to name me Thursyl (thanks for not doing that, mom). But for all that, she loved my father more than ice cream. She was a good woman. I did love her...but I didn't really KNOW her.

She lived far away, and her lifestyle kept her even farther away. My dad worked at keeping his family at a distance, and now that we're all adults, it seems natural to keep doing it.

But I should go home. I should do it for my dad. I should do it for myself. I should do it to honour the relationship that I always wished I had with a woman I hardly knew. I should do it to honour the relationships that my cousins DID have. And to reconnect with a family that I haven't seen in ages.

I will have to see what's going on...the flight is over $500, and I only have 3 days in which to complete it. I'd leave at 6 on Wednesday (from Moncton) and then come back out of Toronto at 8 on Friday morning. It's a whirlwind. I'm going to have to see if I can make it happen or not.

I'll keep you posted. On all of it.

I have a day to spend with my DM tomorrow. His boss is apparently the one that told DD's boss to cool it with the fraternizing. So we'll see if MY boss dares to say anything to me. I really WILL tell him to fuck himself if that's the case.

But first I'll get permission for the bereavement leave. :)

Disappointed actually...

Created by OnePlusYou

While this is less than a quarter of the pages, it's still 104% higher than other blogs that have assessed themselves. I'm still quite disappointed.

Fuck.

What a lovely weekend. :)

Friday at the school went well. I held it together right up until the end of the hour, at which point I realized I hadn't come up with any sort of summary or logical termination point for the lesson. Oopsie. Lucky for me the kids had to rush off to an assembly, so I had them put their desks back, gather the name cards, and then I was done. It was a whole lot of fun, and I'm looking forward to this week again.

One little girl complimented my shoes. I was expecting this, as grade 6 girls tend to always compliment something that the classroom visitor has/brings/wears. But this was not the usual 'you're pretty' kind of compliment, or 'I like your shoes!'. It was 'Hey! Where'd you get your shoes?' I replied with, 'I think I got these ones at Payless...' "Oh. That's all the way in Moncton." So I think that was a compliment, followed by disappointment when she realized she'd have to enlist help to go purchase some of her own. Ah well. My Chucks ARE cool. So there.

Friday night I was supposed to go to a concert in SJ with DD--but I did not. I encouraged him to be a responsible adult and do work and be home earlyish on Friday night, as he had to work in F'ton on Saturday morning at 7am. Would have made attending a concert until 3 not such a wise move. Something *I* would do, even.

Instead, I went for beer with Caillean here in town. We went to the pub that I usually go to, had a couple of drinks and some skins, and a lovely little visit. I was home and in bed by 1:30, which was a nice change.

Saturday morning I was going to go into Halifax for a Gaelic day, but when the alarm went off at 5:40 am, I looked menacingly at it, and said 'fuck it'. I rolled over, and reawakened at 11:40 am. It was a GREAT sleep.

I spent Saturday afternoon cruising around being domestic. I went to check out the competition in town, they were not busy. They were also very messy and not very well stocked. That was kind of a nice little present to my ego. Then, my butt and I went to visit some furniture at Sears. We agreed that only one of the sofas was even remotely comfortable, and that it was still rather ugly. My butt and I then left.

We went to Canadian Tire to look around, particularly at mitre saws. I didn't see any there that I liked (i.e. were a good enough bargain!). Again, my butt decided to test out some patio furniture. We, my butt and I, agreed on one particular set that was both stylish AND comfortable...but we also agreed that it was a ridiculous amount of money to spend on a patio set. It comes with an 'outdoor' La-Z-Boy recliner. Who the hell needs one of those?! The set, 2 chairs (1 a la-z-boy), a love-seat and a coffee table of dubious stability for the bargain price of only $1400. Not in this lifetime.

I went to work to pick up some materials. I had some actual home improvements that needed doing. I bought myself a mitre saw from the clearance table, a DeWalt 10" Compound Mitre Saw with a dust bag, and a free palm sander. For only $200. I rock.
I also picked up some 2x4s, a quarter sheet of plywood, some paint, and some electrical box covers. In order to be in compliance with my insurance company's arbitrary demands, I had to do a few things. Oh yes, and I also, finally, bought myself a propane tank so that I can use my BBQ! Woot!


I built a railing. Isn't it lovely?

I also installed covers on some junction boxes in my garage, as well as painted a sheet of plywood with which to cover up the window next to my oil pipe. Apparently you're not allowed to have an operable window within 3 feet of an oil intake. Which is okay, as the window doesn't open. But the insurance company was convinced that it does, so I had to cover it up, take its photo, and send it away.

I felt like I was channeling Bob Villa all day. It was great. And then I BBQd some chicken for supper...so good.

Saturday night was a bit melancholy, as I had no plans and nothing to do. I wanted to go out, but such is life in Amherst. I talked very briefly to Billy on MSN--he's in another one of his non-communicative states--and we both ended up staying home not doing much of anything.

Sunday morning I managed to sleep in again. It was great. I hauled bricks and built tables in the greenhouse at work all afternoon, thankfully with the help and assistance of 4 other people. At 4, we came home. At that point, I came home and began tidying here. I was running the sink for dishes, and contemplating supper, when the phone rang. It was DD. He had said he might be out and about on his motorcycle and would help move bricks if in town. (which in passive-crush speak is 'i'm looking for an excuse to come see you, and am prepared to move bricks in order to do it'--I guess that's not such a bad thing. But.)

Anyway, I fed him BBQ steak and made him help me move furniture. He crashed in the spare room again because the temperature dropped so quickly in the evening and it would have been ridiculously cold on the bike. He lives 2.5 hours away.

Funny that someone would travel 2.5 hours to move heavy things in order to spend time with me, when the guy I was dating for the last year wouldn't even drive 2 hours to see my new house or get laid. Feh.

What else...yesterday. Monday.

The trees and shrubs began to show up at the store. I helped to unload about half a truck of trees.

Ache? Holy moly do I ache. I ached last night, so I had a nice hot shower when I got home. I sat all night and did nothing, I was so tired. And this morning? I'm still achy but am having a very hard time getting motivated to do much of anything.

Anyway...time for work.

It was a lovely weekend of home improvement, my dining room looks like a ROOM now, my portable washing machine is now in the basement where it belongs, my bookcase is in the hallway, and my side-board is in the dining room. You know, it is almost starting to feel like a home. Gotta be careful of that! *heh*

Happy Tuesday!

Interesting

It's interesting to me that today, I wake up nervous.

I'm not a nervous person. I seldom get anxious about things, or experiences. Oh, I get last minute jitters, but never 'days in advance' nerves. I went to bed last night a bit nervous, and this morning I woke up much the same way.

Today I head into a local school to deliver the 'Business Basics' course from Junior Achievement to a classroom of 6th graders. It's the first time I've done the program as an instructor, and taking it myself 25 years ago hardly counts as prep-time. *grin*

I'm excited about it, because I think it will be fun. But I don't think I'm prepared enough to lead a roomful of 11 year olds through anything, let alone a lesson! At least the teacher will be there. If I fail miserably, I expect that he'll step in to help.

Wish me luck! I'm on at 12:30!

Now, I'm off to work. Blech--the good news is, I'm off for the weekend! First of three in a row! Woooooo-hooooo!

Happy Friday!

No matter what the question--love is the answer.

Eeeeeeew.

I just looked out the window on the way to the shower. There's FROST on my car.

*shuddeR*

Yummy!

I loooooove my bed. It's so cozy in here. Getting up sucks. Just thought you should know.